• The author found the empty nest phase unexpectedly fulfilling and transformative.
• Initial sadness and loneliness gave way to new hobbies, self-discovery, and connection.
• Motherhood continues in new forms, with evolving relationships and meaningful family moments.

I expected the empty nest to be a lonely and sad place. Instead, I learned that motherhood doesn't end; it evolves.

When my youngest of four left for college, I cried for days. Someone said to me that they thought I would get used to it. That having four kids makes it easier in some strange way. It is not easier. The silence that came from the last kiddo leaving felt almost shocking. I knew that I would feel sadness, but the finality of it all was a struggle.

My husband and I had moments when we would look at each other and burst out into tears. One afternoon, we sat on the couch crying.

When each child leaves, the dynamics of the home change. We had a rowdy household. There were always doors opening and closing, and friends coming over. We laughed together and, of course, had some disagreements from time to time.

The final kiddo leaving meant the house was pin-drop quiet. Eating dinner at the table together was a bit depressing for the two of us in the first few months.

I had a hard time being OK for a while

Friends would tell me, "You'll be fine, this is normal. You still get to have a relationship with your kids." I knew they came from a good place when they said it, but they missed the depth of what I was feeling. I didn't want to be "fine." I wanted to feel like myself again. For a short time, I had a hard time envisioning that my life would be OK after they moved out.

I walked around the house asking myself questions. Who was I now? What was I supposed to do? What if my husband and I didn't like each other now that we are alone?

My schedule suddenly became slow. There were no games to attend, and no need to stay up late to ensure they got home safely. I used to leave the family room light on at night. The first time I turned it off, knowing no one was coming home, I felt a pit in my stomach and went to bed crying.

Sitting in my home office, I recall thinking that I would have to do something for myself. But what? I have always thrown myself into work, so it seemed like the logical idea. I did focus on work for a while, and I felt empty.

I had to find a way to move forward

One afternoon, mid-sentence in talking with my husband, I burst out in tears. I couldn't explain it, but my body felt a deep ache. I felt physical pain attached to all of the kids being gone. This was a pivotal moment in my life. I could have allowed myself to wallow in the pain, but instead, I knew I needed to make a change. I needed to find a way to move forward. If I didn't, I would miss the good things that were unfolding right in front of me.

My husband saw I was having a hard time. So, he encouraged me to be more spontaneous. We started doing simple things like taking the convertible out with the top down. We tried new restaurants. We laughed, we played cards, took walks, tried new hobbies, and attended neighborhood get-togethers. After a period of time, I started to feel lighter. I was having fun! Something that six months earlier, I would not have expected.

I started making jewelry, crocheting, and creating art journals. I loved crocheting. I realized crocheting fulfilled a need to nurture. I made blankets for family, friends, and people in hospitals facing illness. I love picking out the yarn, creating the blanket, and delivering them.

I found ways to stay connected

Along with spending time getting reacquainted with myself, I found ways to stay connected. FaceTime calls with my grandsons are filled with giggles and stories. My kids, who are still in college, call nearly daily. They celebrate their wins and talk through their challenges. There have been broken arms, twisted ankles, and car accidents. My son, who started his own business, calls to share his wins and dreams. They still need their mother, just in a different way now.

I took a trip to spend time with my daughter when my second grandson was born. Watching my daughter step into motherhood with two children was beautiful. She was experiencing all the things I had cherished as a parent. It brought back so many memories of me as a young mother holding her.

I flew out to surprise my son on his 30th birthday. I didn't hesitate when my daughter-in-law shared her idea with me. I planned the trip immediately and flew out to celebrate with him a couple of months later.

The hugs are different now. The bedtime stories may be gone. But holding my new grandson and being involved in their life, even through technology, showed me something. Motherhood didn't end. It evolved into a version of itself I didn't know was possible.

• Anthropic philosopher Amanda Askell shared her approach to effective AI prompting.
• Askell emphasized clarity, experimentation, and philosophical thinking in prompt engineering.
• Anthropic advises treating AI like a new employee needing explicit, precise instructions.

A cornerstone of philosophy is the ability to communicate ideas clearly and precisely.

That's also the key to getting the most out of an AI model, according to Anthropic's own resident philosopher.

Amanda Askell, a member of Anthropic's technical team and a trained philosopher, says that effective prompting requires striking the right balance between several considerations.

On Anthropic's "Ask Me Anything" podcast, Askell, who studied philosophy at Oxford and New York University, according to her LinkedIn, explained her thought process.

"It is really hard to distill what is going on because one thing is just like a willingness to interact with the models a lot and to really look at output after output," she said.

Good prompters should be "very experimental," she said.

Prompting goes beyond experimentation, however, and this is where her philosophical training has helped.

"This is where I actually do think philosophy can actually be useful for prompting in a way because, like, a lot of my job is just being like I try and explain some issue or concern or thought that I'm having to the model as clearly as possible," she said.

That emphasis on clarity is important not just to help people refine their own prompts but also in understanding AI itself.

In a "Prompt Engineering Overview" that Anthropic published in July, the company said users interacting with Claude, its chatbot, should think of it as "a brilliant, but very new employee (with amnesia) who needs explicit instructions."

"Claude does not have context on your norms, styles, guidelines, or preferred ways of working. The more precisely you explain what you want, the better Claude's response will be," Anthropic wrote.

Veteran venture capitalist Marc Andreessen said last month that the power of AI comes from treating it as a"thought partner."

"Part of the art of AI is what questions to ask it," he said.

Those who master this skill can land lucrative jobs as prompt engineers, which have a median salary of $150,000, according to levels.fyi, a platform for tech workers to research and compare salaries.

• A Malibu home once owned by Kanye West is being offered as a fractional real estate asset.
• A new venture allows investors to buy memberships for access and equity in luxury properties.
• The owner of the property hopes to transform West's former home into a Soho House-like space.

Do you want to own a piece of a home once owned by Kanye West?

Steven "Bo" Belmont is betting that you do.

Belmont, who purchased the Tadao Ando-built home from West for $21 million in 2024, has big plans for this concrete slab in Malibu: turning it into a luxury community space for members in the vein of the Soho House. Belmont wants to let multiple people share in his property by selling paid memberships for access to the space and a share in its equity.

There's just one complication: West famously gutted the home before selling it.

"The equity in this is built on the finishing of the property," Belmont told Business Insider. "So when they invest, those dollars go toward just moving that property down the line."

Fractional real estate's main purpose is to democratize real estate investing so more people can get in on the action. Belmont is admittedly raising the barrier to entry with his latest venture, Populis, offering not just the potential to make money, but opulent experiences — like hanging out at events in a Tadao Ando-built beach house in Malibu once owned by a famous rapper.

"We made the entry a little bit higher, which tends to cater to more of an accredited investor," Belmont said. "But as we push through the luxury end of Populis, we will absolutely be spinning one out once we have the bandwidth to accommodate the full democratization of real estate and other goods, other real-world assets."

Fractional ownership for the wealthy

The Malibu mansion is listed for $12 million by Christie's International Real Estate SoCal, but that doesn't tell the entire story.

"This is not a traditional whole-asset sale," the listing reads. "It is a private, membership-driven opportunity designed for buyers seeking exposure to blue-chip real estate without assuming full ownership, management, or renovation responsibility."

Belmont, alongside Alexandra Damsker and Matthew Hintz, founded Populis, which is essentially a crowdfunding endeavor to turn "architecturally significant properties" into Soho House-like spaces while also giving investors a chance to make some money.

Belmont isn't solely in the business of catering to the ultrawealthy investor. His company Belwood Investments caters to the everyday investor looking to participate in luxury real estate flips.

But for a product like the Malibu house, he figured he needed some extra muscle in backing power — enter Populis.

The membership program, which is beginning with the Malibu house, aims to be a "civic movement of architects, artists, and outsiders reclaiming culture's rarest places," according to its website.

Through four different membership tiers, investors — after investing anywhere from $15,000 to over $100,000 — gain access to the properties in the form of tours, events, and summits at each.

"There's the opportunity to socialize and hang out with all of these other investors and meet at these amazing properties," Belmont said. "There are a lot of these really world-class class amazing properties around the world that we are able to offer to the masses."

Bringing life to an abandoned home

Kanye West bought the home in 2021 for $57 million, but never lived in it. It's one of a few properties West has unloaded recently, like one of his ranches in Wyoming. If all goes according to Belmont's plan, the Malibu home will see life where it hasn't in years.

As Belmont sees it, the home has value outside West's involvement. It's a uniquely built structure right on the Pacific Ocean that plenty of people will want to visit.

"This is not a regular single-family home — this is not even a regular concrete home — this is something completely different," Belmont said.

• After my fiancé's sudden death, I became a single mom of twins overnight.
• Grief transformed my priorities, fueling growth in my career and personal life.
• I've also found purpose in reimagining the future for myself and my children.

Most of my weekday mornings follow the same script. I pull into the drop-off line outside of my twins' elementary school, double-check their backpacks and take a sip of my coffee from my bright pink Yeti cup before it cools. But on a rainy November morning, sitting in the slow-moving line of cars, I found myself deep in thought.

Before the doors opened, my twins, 6, reached for my hand, so we could do our quick handshake, a ritual we created to help them walk into kindergarten with confidence and a way to let them know I will be back to get them. My daughter jumped out of the car, quiet and observant, while my son lingered long enough to look back and say, "Have a great day, Mommy!"

As the teachers waved them toward the entrance, I watched their confidence. And in that moment, it hit me. My children had come a long way in the past two-and-a-half years. I had, too.

Losing my fiancé reshaped me

I became a single mother on April 15, 2023, the day my fiancé, the father of my twins, died unexpectedly from complications related to diabetes. He was only 31.

Our twins were just 3 when they stood in front of their daddy's light blue casket. My memories from that period feel fragmented; grief has a way of blurring the days, weeks, and sometimes whole months.

However, I learned very quickly that grief doesn't stop life from moving forward.

In the year that followed, I underwent a significant transformation. Loss clarified my priorities. It forced me to look directly at the future I needed to build. Not later, but now.

As my business grew, so did my commitment to the work

My freelance writing business — something I had nurtured for over 10 years — began to grow. I wrote late into the night after my twins fell asleep, telling stories about Detroit's resilience, the complexity of motherhood, and the intimate corners of grief for a variety of outlets.

Those nights of "burning the midnight oil," became reminders that forward motion was still possible.

That clarity carried me into March 2024, where I began a new career on public relations team at a university, a team I had collaborated with a couple years prior for freelance assignments. It was an alignment. I was stepping into PR with the storytelling foundation I'd been building in journalism behind the scenes for years.

Two months later, while settling into that new role, I received a Society of Professional Journalists award for a feature I wrote while planning my fiancé's funeral. That recognition wasn't about timing. It was validation for me. Proof that my voice still held power, even during some of the hardest days of my life.

Creating a scholarship in my fiancé's honor helped me rebuild with purpose

In the spring of 2024, a year after his passing, I established a scholarship in my fiancé's honor at our alma mater, awarded annually to a graduating senior heading to college.

The scholarship wasn't about memoralizing grief, it was about ensuring his name stood for something bigger than loss. Creating it gave me a purpose at a time when everything else felt unsteady, allowing me to turn our pain to a path forward for someone else.

A new beginning — for all of us — came about

Then came another milestone, one that made his absence feel sharper than before.

This fall, on my twins' first day of kindergarten, I stood among parents taking photos as my children explored their classroom, checking cubbies and searching for new friends outside of each other. While they were beginning school, I was beginning something new, too. I had my first day of graduate school.

People often ask me, "How do you balance everything — single motherhood, graduate school, a new career, freelancing, grief?"

But balance isn't what carried us. Ambition did. Rebuilding did. And many nights of silent prayers.

Today, as I prepare for my final exams and wrap up my assignments for 2025, my twins are settling deeper into their school year — bringing home art projects, forming friendships, and rediscovering joy. They are healing. And so am I.

Grief rewired by ambition. My children shaped it. And the life we are building now is not built on balance, but on steady, intentional work of becoming.

• The author found that displaying family photos creates a sense of warmth and boosts mood at home.
• Growing up without family photos inspired her to fill her adult home with cherished memories.
• Displaying photographs has become a meaningful and affordable way to foster connection and happiness.

I grew up with my father, who never had photos developed and framed. When I spent time at friends' houses, I envied the warmth that family photos brought to their homes. Very early on, I knew I wanted my adult home to be more like that.

I saw the value in displaying photographs of loved ones and happy memories, and I craved it. By middle school, I started buying disposable cameras with my babysitting money and taking pictures when I hung out with friends.

I noticed the positive effect that photos had on my mood very quickly

I didn't have my own adult home yet, but I put pictures of my friends and me along the border of my bedroom mirror and regularly switched out my favorite photos in my school binder cover. I was searching for ways to create my own little spaces in the world, filled with memories that made me feel better. No matter what kind of mood I was in, whenever I saw those pictures, I felt loved.

By the time I was in high school and college, I was the one making copies of photos for friends. I noticed how exuberant my best friends would become when I gave them a photo of us being silly or just having a good time together. Before digital cameras and smartphones, looking at new pictures that had just been developed was really exciting for us.

Photographs allowed me to make a home on a small budget

When I had my son in my 20s, I knew I wanted to create a warm home, filled with photographs for him to see everywhere. As a single parent, photographs have been an inexpensive yet extremely effective way to make our home feel like a home. He has always loved it when I get new pictures to put up on the fridge or have framed.

It makes me really happy that I did this one simple thing differently from my dad, because I've seen it make an impact on my son's life. I can see his face light up when he looks at certain pictures that are displayed, even ones that have been on the wall his entire life.

At 12, he's now decorating his room in the same way I once did, pinning pictures of his friends up on the corkboards in his bedroom.

Pictures of my family help me always see what matters

Now that I've remarried, there are a lot of pictures of us together as a family or of just my husband and me.

It's really hard to stay mad at my husband when I walk past a picture of us on our honeymoon, and it's even more difficult to be upset with my son when I see a picture of him as a baby. It helps me see him as that baby again, who needs just as much love and support from me now as he did then. And when I see my husband and me so happy and in love, it makes me want to hang on to that and not take it for granted.

These pictures of different times in our lives don't just make us happier, but they are powerful reminders of what's most important. There's a part of me that's sad for not having experienced that when I was growing up, but I'm also relieved that I learned how to do it for myself and my family as an adult. My son loves photos just as much as I do, and so I know he'll grow up to display them in his own spaces. It's such a simple yet important thing he's going to be able to do for himself and his loved ones, and that makes me really happy.

• Business Insider spoke with three perfume experts about the best fragrances to wear for winter.
• Gourmand scents are still popular, and heady, musky fragrances are great for cold weather.
• Perfumers also recommend leaning into brooding, dramatic, dark-academia vibes this winter.

When the chill sets in and you find yourself swapping lightweight sweaters and trench coats for bulky jackets, don't forget to give your fragrance shelf a seasonal refresh, too.

Winter fragrances often lean richer, warmer, and more enveloping — think amber, spice, woods, and heady florals that wrap around you like a cozy, knitted blanket.

Business Insider spoke with three perfumers about which scents they love for winter and why. From narcotic florals to warm ambers, here's what they said about their seasonal favorites.

Warm yourself up with amber.

Amber fragrances provide some coziness in cold weather.

Dana Schmitt, New York City-based perfumer at the fragrance company Givaudan, said that one of her longtime favorites is Chanel Coromandel, a soft yet luxurious scent. It's a plush, amber perfume anchored by patchouli and frankincense.

Another staple she recommends is REPLICA's Jazz Club, a classic scent built on rich, spicy, and woody notes.

It evokes the feeling of settling into a dim jazz lounge on a chilly winter night in the city — making it perfect for a romantic date night.

Just like in the fall, gourmand scents continue to stay popular.

Gourmands — including vanilla, caramel, and honey — are just so cozy for winter, bringing warmth and comfort when the temperatures drop.

Bryson Ammons, New York City-based perfumer and founder of The Alloy Studio, likes to push the category a bit further by incorporating a bit of spice.

He really enjoys Amphora Parfum Honeycakes, a sweet yet savory scent that feels both nostalgic and surprising. "It's like a spiced coffee — a very sticky, syrupy fragrance," he said.

For something more amber-forward but still gourmand, Schmitt points to Mugler Angel Eau de Parfum, a sweet, praline scent that also features signature notes of patchouli and bergamot.

Narcotic, headier scents are the way to go.

Winters can be cold. When it's under 30 degrees, New York City-based independent perfumer Asia Grant likes leaning into narcotic, smooth fragrances that feel like wrapping yourself in cashmere and tucking into a dim, cozy library.

Rich musks and heady florals really come alive in cold weather, and also add a brooding, dark-academia vibe that pairs well with chunky sweaters and penny loafers.

Grant recommends Dominique Ropion's Carnal Flower, an intoxicating, full-bodied fragrance that features notes of melon, tuberose, and white musk.

Because it's so highly concentrated, she often likes layering it with lighter, fresher scents to balance it out.

Brighten up the chilly weather with citrusy scents.

Lemons, oranges, limes, and grapefruits might make you think "summer," but they're technically winter-blooming fruits, which makes them a natural fit for cold-weather fragrances, said Ammons.

They also add a bit of brightness and zing to the chillier months.

Bring the outdoors in with a fresh, woodsier scent.

Although spicy and ambery scents are a given for winter, Ammons likes to shake things up with fresh, woodsy one. Think: light florals, clean laundry, freshly-fallen snow, and a wisp of smoke.

One of his go-tos is Aesop's Rozu Eau De Parfum, which pairs notes of rose and bergamot with sandalwood and musk.

"There's something clean and kind of chic about it," Ammons said.

• Netflix has become a rival to Hallmark and Lifetime with its original holiday films.
• This year, it released four new holiday films.
• "Jingle Bell Heist" is easily the best.

When Netflix released "A Christmas Prince" in 2017, it became one of the true viral moments of the holiday season — eight years later, the streamer is still chasing that high.

This year, Netflix released four new Christmas films: "My Secret Santa," "A Merry Little Ex-Mas," "Champagne Problems," and "Jingle Bell Heist." They range from entertaining to bonkers.

Here are this year's new Netflix holiday movies ranked from worst to best.

4. "My Secret Santa"

People have been describing "My Secret Santa" (a title that doesn't even make sense, by the way) as the "reverse 'Mrs. Doubtfire.'"

To that I say: just go watch "Mrs. Doubtfire."

My list of notes, observations, and questions was by far the longest for this movie, which stars Alexandra Breckenridge as Taylor Jacobsen, a single mom (and former teen rock star, somehow), who decides her daughter must go to an exorbitantly expensive snowboarding school at a ski resort, and the only job she can find requires dressing up as an old man to become the resort's resident Santa Claus.

Along the way, she meets a man, Matthew (Ryan Eggold), who is quite determined to get to know her — for truly no reason besides the fact that she's pretty — but, gasp, he turns out to be the resort owner's son.

This might all sound pretty normal, but believe me, this movie seems like it was written backward. As in, since they needed Taylor to have access to some of the best prosthetics since "Frankenstein," her brother and his husband happen to be obsessed with Halloween.

Also, Taylor was just really bad at being Santa for too much of the runtime.

This brings me to the villain, Natasha, as played by Tia Mowry. She's hyper-competent, dedicated to her job, and has been at the resort for years. But when it's time for someone to get a promotion, Matthew the Nepo Baby gets it instead. Was I supposed to not root for her as she tried to sabotage his (quite poor) attempts at running things? Because I did not! She deserved the promotion!

Ultimately, this movie is deranged (but not in a fun way), the two leads have no chemistry, and it makes the cardinal sin of evoking a much better movie. It was a skip from me.

3. "A Merry Little Ex-Mas"

Now this is a movie that's deranged in a fun way.

"A Merry Little Ex-Mas" stars Alicia Silverstone as Kate, an architect turned stay-at-home mom (and handyman, for some reason), who is recently separated from her husband, Everett (Oliver Hudson), their small town's doctor.

So many choices in this were baffling. For instance, everyone in the town calls Kate's house the "Mothership." Why? It doesn't matter — it never gets explained. Kate and Everett's daughter, Sienna, brings home her British boyfriend, who inexplicably thinks he's a character in "Harry Potter," which is a bit dated in 2025. Fellow '90s queen Melissa Joan Hart is in this movie for around 5 minutes, and it was, frankly, rude not to give her more to do.

This movie's saving grace was Kate's much younger boyfriend, Chet, played by Pierson Fodé, who was hilarious. Everett's new girlfriend, Tess, played by Jameela Jamil, also brought a lot of laughs.

However, the romance between Kate and Everett just wasn't explored enough. From the first scene they're in together, it's clear there was no reason to split up in the first place — they needed some couple's therapy and to work on their communication skills.

I want better for two '90s legends than this.

2. "Champagne Problems"

Sue me, I thought this was cute! Any movie that takes place in Paris during Christmas is going to earn extra points with me, it's just a fact.

"Champagne Problems" stars Minka Kelly as Sydney, a dedicated employee at her mergers and acquisitions firm, but who has no life of her own. When she gets sent to Paris right around Christmas to pitch an acquisition of a local Champagne brand, she takes one night for herself and meets Henri (Tom Wozniczka). Can you see where this is going?

Yes, of course, Henri is the son of the man whose business Sydney wants to take over.

But Sydney's not the only one competing for the chateau's business. There are a few pleasantly kooky side characters who are along for the journey.

My main takeaway from this movie is that I should probably book a flight to Paris immediately (I also frantically Googled if the bookstore in the movie was real. It's not, sadly). My secondary thoughts include that Kelly and Wozniczka have great chemistry, and I need to pop a bottle of bubbly this Christmas.

1. "Jingle Bell Heist"

This was an easy choice. "Jingle Bell Heist" is the only one of these movies that didn't have an overly bright, but somehow still flat, aesthetic.

It also stars two promising young actors, Olivia Holt and Connor Swindells. Holt plays Sophie, an American living in London so her mom can access cheaper cancer treatment — Sophie is also a star pick-pocket who learned everything she knows from her magician grandfather, which … sure. Swindells plays Nick, a computer expert who has recently been released from jail after being accused of robbing a department store.

Nick and Sophie link up to rob that same department store on Christmas Eve for their own reasons, but, of course, things never go smoothly in a film like this.

I give screenwriters Abby McDonald and Amy Reed a lot of credit, because this movie had more than one twist that genuinely shocked me. I also vibed with Michael Fimognari's direction, as it's clear he was doing his best '70s crime-thriller tribute. Lastly, the brassy score by Steve Hackman was great; it was giving "Ocean's Eleven."

My one knock on this movie is that the relationship between Sophie and Nick was pretty boring, all things considered. Perhaps they just had better platonic chemistry than romantic.

Even so, this was easily my favorite of Netflix's holiday films this year, and one I would recommend to anyone.

• Northeastern retirees are opting for North Carolina over Florida for its low-key beach lifestyle.
• North Carolina has a warmer climate than the Northeast and is more accessible than Florida.
• Calabash, North Carolina, has a calmer lifestyle than some Florida cities, and is still near the beach.

Fleeing the Northeast and flying south — usually to Florida — to wait out the winter in warmer weather is a common move for snowbirds. But some retirees aren't flying quite as far south anymore for an escape.

Take Diana Cawood, who skipped Florida altogether and relocated to North Carolina from New Jersey at the end of 2019.

"Florida was not an option," Cawood told Business Insider, adding that it was important that she be in reasonable driving distance back to New Jersey to see her children and grandchildren.

"We can drive back to New Jersey in about nine hours," she said. "That's a day trip rather than a couple of days."

Cawood, 61, started looking for places five years before she retired in 2019. She knew she wanted a warmer climate than New Jersey, more favorable taxes, and a quieter life than the city provided. Wilmington, North Carolina, didn't quite fit the bill, and neither did Hilton Head, South Carolina.

Then she discovered a retirement town that's less crowded than Florida cities like Naples or Tampa and is a shorter commute back to the Northeast: Calabash, North Carolina.

The coastal town near the border of South Carolina is about 27 miles northeast of Myrtle Beach and offers a quiet, beachy lifestyle for retirees. Cawood and her husband settled on Kingfish Bay, a housing development about four miles from the nearest beach — and 569 miles from Medford Lakes, New Jersey, where they moved from. But that's still a better commute than driving home from anywhere in Florida.

Florida isn't for every retiree

Kathie Yllanes, 64, grew up on Long Island and moved to Calabash in 2017 from Raleigh, North Carolina. She's been retired for just over a year and said she travels to the Northeast about six times a year.

"Our oldest son still lives on Long Island, our grandkids are on Long Island, our daughter just moved to Boston, and we have a son who's in the Charlotte area," Yllanes told Business Insider. "Being able to get to Long Island, even though it's not easy to get there, is a lot easier than if you were in Florida."

Although the weather isn't as warm year-round in North Carolina as it is in Florida, it's still significantly warmer than in the Northeast — a plus for many retirees.

"The weather was a big factor in why we wanted to move here," Cawood said. "We love the fact that this area gives us all four seasons without the dramatic effects of winter. It gets pretty hot in the summer, but I don't know that it gets any hotter than where we were from in New Jersey. It may stay hot a little bit longer, but it's certainly not uncomfortable. But that is the reason we did not want to go to Florida, because we just didn't want to deal with that heat all the time."

Florida still is one of the better places to retire, though that depends on what you're looking for. While cities like Fort Lauderdale and St. Petersburg offer a lot for retirees, some lament that they've become overcrowded and expensive.

North Carolina real estate agent Darren Bouley said that not only has he seen an uptick in Northeasterners choosing the Calabash area, he's also seen "half-backs," or people originally from the Northeast who move to Florida and then move halfway back up the coast, leaving Florida for North Carolina.

"From the feedback we've been getting, Florida has lost a little bit of its allure simply because the costs have changed down there," Bouley said. "Also, the population has just gotten a little more dense than people are interested in having."

Yllanes' parents were half-backs who moved from Deerfield Beach, Florida, to Calabash, North Carolina. She said Florida wasn't for her, either.

Ex-Floridian retirees are finding a lot to like in North Carolina

The pandemic years were a boon for people moving to Florida, helping it become the fastest-growing state in 2022 thanks to its sunny weather and generally affordable cost of living. But as factors like home insurance price increases have people leaving Florida, states like North Carolina are capitalizing.

State-to-state migration data from the US Census shows nearly 40,000 people moved from Florida to North Carolina in 2023, the highest number from any state — including neighbor South Carolina.

Samuel Miller, a representative for Kingfish Bay, told Business Insider that Calabash, North Carolina's cost of living is on par with Florida's, and maybe better.

"We've had people come up from Florida to the development and particularly from the Northeast because they see the value down here, both in the housing prices and what you get for your buck," Miller said.

"When you talk of the state tax rates, for example, it's better in North Carolina than the Northeast, and that's obviously not a comparison for Florida," he added. "But in Miami, the cost of living is higher. You're going to get areas in Florida that are less expensive, but certainly the big centers are going to be more expensive. On the whole, Calabash is generally a very cost-effective place to live."

• When my son wanted a new toy, I told him to start a business where he could earn money.
• He decided to help neighbors collect and take out their trash.
• He had to work up some courage, but now he's making money and becoming part of the community.

After listening to my son try and convince me that he absolutely needed whatever the latest toy was that he was fixated on, I replied with, "That sounds like a want, not a need. You can use your money to buy it."

He told me he didn't have enough cash. At 6 years old, his only sources of money were birthday gifts and the tooth fairy.

In our family, we don't give money for household chores as we believe it's everyone's responsibility to pitch in and complete the tasks that keep a household running. We also don't give a set allowance.

My husband chimed in with, "Let's think of some ways you can earn money."

After tossing around a number of ideas, one stood out above the rest: taking in and out the trash and recycling bins for our neighbors. My garbage and recycling truck-loving kiddo was excited and ready to go.

As parents, we're there to support, but not do the work for him. He was about to get a crash course in business and in life.

He first had to gain some confidence

In order to get clients, we helped him prepare a marketing flyer and a short pitch. But when he realized that he was the one who would have to go door to door, he almost gave up before he got started.

This led to a talk about facing your fears, understanding that getting a "no" is simply part of the process, and that you can only control your actions — not another person's.

After gathering his courage and multiple practice sessions, he was ready to go. He knocked on the doors of neighbors he had never met and was rejected more than a few times. But those first few neighbors who said "yes" gave him the confidence to keep going.

Now he has nine clients, but more than that, he has gained skills that most kids don't learn until their teenage years or beyond.

He quickly earned some money

Initially, he charged 25 cents a week, and once he gained experience, he increased his rate to 50 cents. Each month, my husband creates invoices in QuickBooks, and my son delivers them to his customers.

In the first month, one of his clients showed him a water bill with all the extra fees associated with it. He explained that if a company can tack on seemingly random fees, then he wanted to give my son additional pay for good customer service and on-time delivery. His $1 rose to $5.

To help him learn about saving, we opened a bank account and told him that whatever he decides to save each month, we would match, but it needs to remain in his account for at least six months. The rest he can spend as he wants.

Initially, he was excited to spend his money, but as time has passed, he has started to think more strategically because he now understands how much time and effort it takes to earn it.

He's learned about commitment and community

Tuesdays are trash takeout days. It's also a full school day followed by his First Communion class, which means he doesn't get home until around 5:30 p.m.

That first Tuesday, he came home after class, saying he was tired and wanted to rest and watch TV. We reminded him of the timeframe he gave his clients — between 5 p.m. and 6 p.m.— and that keeping your word comes first. After a few grumbles, he got going.

Over the months, he has shown up on time, rain or shine, with a smile on his face and has earned the trust and respect of his customers.

His business has also allowed him and us to become part of the fabric of our community. We moved into our neighborhood a year and a half ago and would wave to neighbors and exchange pleasantries, but now we're forming true relationships.

He's been invited into what were once strangers' houses, been given birthday presents from people he didn't know a year earlier, and walks down the street with a sense of belonging that this is his community.

But most important is how he sees himself. When the subject of his business comes up, he beams with pride, noting that he is a business owner who earns his own money and helps his neighbors.

And that toy he claimed he needed? Turns out he didn't want to spend his hard-earned money on it after all.