• My dad was a Jamaican immigrant who beat all odds and became an entrepreneur. 
• My mom died when I was 19 and I when my dad died many years later, I thought I knew how to grieve.
• But our relationship was different, we had a unique bond, and so the pain was different. 

My dad was the living embodiment of the American dream and my hero. He wasn't a superhero in a billion-dollar blockbuster — he was a real-life miracle worker, seemingly making the impossible a reality.

A Jamaican immigrant with only a fourth-grade education, my father arrived in Providence, Rhode Island, armed with nothing but an indomitable spirit. Against all odds, he became a successful entrepreneur and accomplished his goal of providing a good life for his family.

My earliest memories of my dad are from when he was 40, just two years younger than I am now. That's when he "made it."

In 1994, we moved from our cramped apartment into what was once his workshop. He transformed it into a cozy one-story home and later added a second level. Our new home featured a circular driveway, a white fence, a brick gate, and a balcony off the master bedroom. For a man who grew up with an outside toilet — an outhouse, as they call it back home — and walked his neighborhood streets barefoot, he'd accomplished the ultimate dream, providing a good life for his family.

I thought I knew how to grieve

The bond we shared was unique. We're both Geminis, with birthdays just four days apart, creating a dynamic that often felt like looking into a mirror — sometimes a reflection I wasn't ready to face. He raised me as a single parent after my mom began shuttling between her native Chicago and Providence when I was 9. This was the 90s, a time before FaceTime, emails, or voice notes. Parenting happened through letters, phone calls, and annual visits. Tragically, my mother died when I was 19.

When I lost my dad in 2022, I foolishly thought I knew how to grieve, having already lost my mom. But I was wrong. The relationship was different, and the pain was unlike anything I had ever experienced.

The only time I didn't see him regularly was during the pandemic, when FaceTime calls from Los Angeles to the East Coast kept us connected. Once we were both vaccinated, I flew home to see him. A few days before I arrived, he suggested a road trip to New Jersey to visit family. I was annoyed at the last-minute change because I already had plans with friends in motion, but I still agreed to take the trip, and I'm so glad that I did. The spontaneous trip to Jersey during Labor Day weekend 2021 took me back to my childhood, filled with road trips to the Jamaica Colosseum Mall in Queens, NY, with old-school soca music providing the soundtrack.

That trip was the last time I saw him.

I still struggle to find the words to describe how I feel

Though the world didn't end during the pandemic, mine shattered. I lost my father under traumatic circumstances — until this day, his case is unsolved and remains a missing persons case. Navigating grief while playing amateur detective and trying to hold on to some semblance of life was the hardest thing I've ever faced. Almost three years later, I still struggle to find the words to articulate how I feel. Through it all, this experience has deepened my empathy and driven me to help others in their grief, believing that no one should have to navigate such pain alone.

This inspiration led me to create "Sorry For Your Loss (Cards)." This greeting card company and community aim to support those grieving by providing resources and simplifying how to show up for someone you love during the most difficult time in their life. Each card features a heart-shaped QR code, allowing recipients to share how they need people to show up for them because dealing with loss is hard enough — helping someone heal shouldn't be. My hope is to not only support people through their grief but also to help restore their joy. Our community events will reflect this energy, incorporating wellness practices and uplifting activities.

Here's how I honor my dad during Father's Day

While I miss my father terribly, I've found a lot of healing and inspiration through my grief. This doesn't mean I don't have difficult days; it's just changed my outlook on life. Now, I have more appreciation for the people I love and my experiences. I'm also more present than I was in the past.

If your father has transitioned into your guardian angel, here are some heartfelt ways to honor him:

• Write a letter: Pouring your feelings onto paper can be a therapeutic release.
• Visit a significant place: Revisit a location filled with cherished memories.
• Donate: Make a contribution to a charity in your father's honor. Last year, we honored my dad with a memorial at the local library in my childhood neighborhood.
• Gather with friends and family: Surround yourself with loved ones to share stories and love.
• Request letters or videos: Ask family and friends to share their favorite memories of your dad, creating a collection to revisit whenever you miss him.
• Create a dad playlist: Compile songs that remind you of your father.
• Honor yourself: If your relationship with your father was complicated, it's OK to take your time and decide how or if you want to celebrate his life.

There's no right way to grieve. Only you can determine the best way to remember and honor your loved one

• Ukraine used a Patriot missile to down a prized Russian A-50 spy plane earlier this year.
• The hi-tech A-50 is crucial for Russia's early warning, command, and control during air operations.
• A senior US officer called the destruction of the A-50 a 'SAMbush.'

A senior US Army officer has confirmed that Ukraine used a Patriot missile system to down a Russian A-50 spy plane back in January.

Speaking at the Fires Symposium event last month, Colonel Rosanna Clemente, the assistant chief of staff of the 10th Army Air and Missile Defense Command, said that Patriot launchers were "being used to protect static sites and critical national infrastructure" in Ukraine.

"Others are being moved around and doing some really historic things that I haven't seen in 22 years of being an air defender. And one of them is a 'SAMbush,'" she said, referring to surface-to-air missile ambushes that Ukrainians have been performing.

"They're doing that with extremely mobile Patriot systems that were donated by the Germans because the systems are all mounted on the trucks."

She added that Ukrainian anti-aircraft teams used this tactic "to engage the first A-50 C2 system back in January."

On the same day, Ukraine also claimed to have shot down an Ilyushin Il-22 airborne command post.

The A-50, produced by manufacturer Beriev, is a crucial spy plane that allows Russia to detect incoming Ukrainian missiles and identify ground targets. The aircraft can also act as a mobile command-and-control center to direct Russia's air strikes and other attacks. It has a range of over 3,000 miles and can stay airborne for about eight hours.

The plane has been a "key enabler for Russian operations over Ukraine providing airborne early warning of threats as well as command and control functionality," according to British intelligence.

Ukraine claimed it downed a second A-50 in February, though it is not yet clear what weapons were used in this instance.

Russia now only has around 5 operational A-50s left, reports say.

In March, Ukraine also attempted to strike the Beriev manufacturing plant where Russia refurbishes and modernizes its A-50s, the think tank the Institute for the Study of War said.

Russian sources claimed that the plant was repairing an A-50 that had been previously damaged in a drone attack.

• Robert Downey Jr. and Anthony Michael Hall are developing a TV series called "Singularity."
• Hall told Business Insider that Downey Jr. plans to direct the pilot episode, which would mark the Oscar-winner's directorial debut.
• Hall said the series had to be revised due to similarities with "Succession."

Anthony Michael Hall and Robert Downey Jr.'s friendship goes back to the mid-1980s when the two met on the set of the John Hughes classic "Weird Science" and soon after were cast members on "Saturday Night Live."

Though their career trajectories diverged — Hall went from '80s teen idol to character actor, Downey Jr. from unknown to "Iron Man" — the two have remained close friends. In fact, Hall is the godfather of Downey Jr.'s son.

Now, the old friends are in development on a TV series that would mark Downey Jr.'s directorial debut.

"We wrote a TV series together, we're calling it 'Singularity,' and it's based on an idea Downey had," Hall told Business Insider.

Hall said the two have been developing it for years (it was first announced by The Wrap in 2016), and it took even longer to get off the ground once they realized what they wrote was similar to the hugely popular HBO series "Succession."

"We had to change things because it wound up being too similar to 'Succession,'" he said. "What I mean by that is I would have played one of three sons, and the father was this tycoon industrialist. It's more of a comedic tone than 'Succession,' but it mirrored it too much, so we had to change things. Downey and I actually had a Zoom session the other day with a top producer who will hopefully come on board."

Hall also revealed that "Singularity" would mark Downey's directorial debut.

"He might direct the pilot and some other episodes along with being in it," Hall said of Downey Jr. "He's committed to being a part of it."

After four decades in the business on screen, Hall said he's focusing more on work behind the scenes. Along with developing "Singularity," Hall also wrote a feature script that he plans to direct.

"It has been a passion and desire for me to do that for many years now," Hall said of trying his hand as a writer-director. "It's the next evolution in my career, being behind the camera." 

• The US Navy has spent over six months battling the Houthis in the Red Sea.
• It's a resource-consuming conflict with no end in sight, raising questions about sustainability.
• Experts say the Houthis are managing to threaten shipping lanes despite the US Navy's efforts.

The US Navy warships deployed to the Middle East have found themselves locked in a high-tempo operating environment as they work around the clock to battle unprecedented attacks from a restless enemy.

The Houthis have proven to be a wily and formidable foe. Five months after rounds of US-led coalition airstrikes to "disrupt and degrade" their capabilities, the militants continue to wreak havoc. They're routinely forcing the US-led task force to intercept their missiles, bomb boats, and flying drones that have turned shipping lanes in the Red Sea and Gulf of Aden into a dangerous — and deadly — corridor.

The Houthis have struck multiple ships in the last week, and US officials say these attacks are unlikely to end anytime soon, raising concerns the US is stuck in a costly and unsustainable standoff.

The Houthis have managed to drag Washington into a prolonged, expensive, resource-depleting conflict and driven shipping costs much higher. While no American warships have been hit, the US must bear the growing financial costs and wear and tear to its warships.

Through their campaign, the rebels have not only proven their role as a formidable asset in Iran's proxy network, but they've also demonstrated that they're more than capable of threatening commercial shipping again in the future.

Is the US military's approach sustainable?

US naval forces have expended a significant amount of resources battling the Houthis since the fall.

The Dwight D. Eisenhower Carrier Strike Group, which consists of the aircraft carrier Ike and several other warships, has fired off more than 500 munitions during its deployment, and its aircraft have flown tens of thousands of hours, Navy officials have disclosed in recent weeks.

The spent munitions alone account for nearly $1 billion, Secretary of the Navy Carlos Del Toro revealed in mid-April, although that figure has certainly gone up in the two months since. This figure, by itself, underscores the growing financial drain of America's naval presence in the region, and it doesn't include the other costs that help sustain the operation.

Business Insider asked the Pentagon and US Central Command for the total cost of counter-Houthi operations but is yet to receive a response.

The US has relied on expensive missiles to destroy Houthi weapons that cost a fraction of the $2.1 million SM-2 interceptor, for instance, but experts say the Pentagon can sustain the increasing missile expenditures for what could be years. What's more of a concern for the US, they say, is sustaining the warships from which these munitions are being launched.

Director of National Intelligence Avril Haines warned last month that the Houthis are likely to remain active for some time. Elements of the Eisenhower strike group have already left the Red Sea once to be rearmed and resupplied, and the Pentagon recently extended its monthslong deployment for a second time.

"As long as we continue to have the will to do this, we can sustain this," retired Gen. Joseph Votel, who served as the CENTCOM commander in the 2010s, told Business Insider. "We're big enough, we have enough capability and capacity to do that. What will matter will be the will of whether we want to continue to pursue this."

A spokesperson for the White House National Security Council said the US remains committed to fighting the Houthis because the rebels remain a "very viable threat" and are still causing problems for shipping companies.

"We will continue to do everything that we can to knock that steel out of the sky and make sure that our Navy is fully prepared to do so," John Kirby told reporters at a Tuesday briefing when asked by BI about the sustainability of the mission.

"We believe it's still vital, and we're going to treat it that way when it comes to resourcing it," he added.

The US has taken several steps to degrade Houthi capabilities with firepower of its own. American forces have conducted several rounds of joint strikes with the UK, targeting rebel facilities and assets across Yemen, and unilaterally destroyed missiles and drones before they can be launched.

The Pentagon has asserted that these routine actions have managed to help degrade the Houthis' capabilities. Haines, however, said they have been "insufficient" to stop the rebels, and experts agree that the US military strategy has largely been unsuccessful.

"I think, unfortunately, the Biden administration has settled into a rhythm where, because of the Houthi attacks on commercial shipping, they feel like they have to do something," Brian Finucane, the senior advisor for the US program at the International Crisis Group, told BI.

"And as is all-too-often the case, that 'do something' is respond militarily, even if the military option is not particularly effective at bringing about an end to them," said Finucane, a former lawyer at the US State Department.

The US, in its strikes, has gone after radars, weapons storage facilities, launch sites, and other rebel assets in Yemen, but the Pentagon has stopped short of taking its military response "to the next level," Votel said. "We are largely defending and blunting, and not trying to remove the capacity that the Houthis actually have."

An 'unstable and unsure' future

For years, the Houthis' destabilizing activities were kept to a regional level, as the rebels fought a catastrophic civil war with Yemen's internationally recognized government and against Saudi Arabia, its neighbor to the north.

But the attacks on commercial shipping have thrust the Houthis onto the world stage. By participating in attacks on Israel and Western naval forces, the rebels have attempted to position themselves as a valuable member of Iran's regional proxy network. More tangibly, though, they have managed to throw a wrench into the workings of a major shipping route, impacting the world economy.

As of February, for instance, shipping through the Red Sea — which normally accounts for up to 15% of international maritime trade — had declined by around 90% since December 2023, according to a Defense Intelligence Agency report published on Thursday. Ships that take an alternate route around Africa add time and money to their journeys.

The impact of these attacks, which have affected the interests of at least 65 countries, is a win for the rebels.

"They seem to have succeeded in disrupting one of the primary national security interests that we have in the region, and that is the free flow of commerce and goods through the waters of the region," Votel said. "That's got to be viewed as a success from their standpoint."

The Houthis have claimed that their actions are in response to Israeli military action in Gaza, itself a response to Hamas' Oct. 7 massacre, but US officials have pushed back on these claims, citing the wide range of countries that have been impacted by the maritime attacks.

Whether a new, lasting ceasefire in Gaza pushes the Houthis to stop their attacks remains to be seen. Notably, the rebels did not adhere to the first ceasefire between Israel and Hamas in November.

Even if the Houthis do stop their attacks as a result of a ceasefire, experts warn that the rebels have demonstrated they retain the weaponry to target shipping lanes whenever they want — a strategy they could always turn to down the road if they contest any sort of regional development, like Israeli military action.

"We are set for a very unstable and unsure period in the foreseeable future," Farzin Nadimi, a senior fellow at The Washington Institute for Near East Policy and an expert on the Persian Gulf region, told BI. "There is a possibility that [the] Houthis will continue to assert some form of control over the shipping traffic in the Red Sea and Bab al-Mandab [Strait]."

Ultimately, any near-term solution to the Houthi conflict this time around may not actually address the long-term threat that the rebels pose, experts say, and the Biden administration's current military approach seems unlikely to permanently fix the problem.

"There's no easy military solution to the various challenges that the Houthis pose," Finucane said. "It's going to require a longer-term political diplomatic process."

For now, though, the Houthi attacks are certain to continue. Over the past week alone, the rebels have struck multiple commercial vessels, even hitting one with an explosive-laden drone boat for the first time — something they've failed to do in previous attempts.

Several Western nations, including the US, are keeping their warships in the region, ready to shoot down missiles and drones at a moment's notice. But with a Gaza ceasefire still out of reach — seemingly the only short-term way that the Houthi attacks might end — these countries are unlikely to pack up and head home anytime soon.

"We have to expect the Houthis will maintain at their current pace for some time," Nadimi said. "Therefore, the Western navies in the region are facing this challenge — whether they can sustain their assets."

• Barbara Fleischman is an art collector and board member for many New York cultural institutions.
• She recently celebrated her 100th birthday, but still puts on events and works out.
• Staying busy and active, and having close friendships may have helped her live so long. 

Barbara Fleischman, 100, has had a more illustrious life than most.

Originally from Detroit, she and her husband, the art dealer Lawrence Arthur Fleischman, moved to New York City in 1966, where they made their mark on the metropolis over 50 years.

Fleischman volunteered for major organizations including Planned Parenthood and The Juilliard School, and has been a trustee of the New York Public Library for 40 years. Her husband served on a White House advisory committee on American art under Presidents Kennedy and Johnson, and co-founded the Archives of American Art at the Smithsonian Institution. Thanks to their philanthropy, the couple had a gallery named after them at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in 1983. They also found time to have two children, now 70 and 74.

"I've just been a lucky lady all my life. First with a great husband, great daughters, wonderful friends, interesting activities, and a reasonable amount of good health," Fleischman told Business Insider. "I am just blessed."

In 1997, her husband died, and in September 2023, Fleischman left her "pretty big apartment" near the United Nations headquarters in New York to move into the Sunrise at East 56th assisted living home after her balance began to fail. Otherwise, she's still active and healthy.

Fleischman's privileged life likely helped her reach 100 in good health, and genetics probably played a part, too. But what she says are her secrets to healthy aging are accessible to most of us: She's not interested in longevity clinics favored by biohackers, for instance, which can cost tens of thousands of dollars.

Here are three habits Fleischman has kept up across her life that may have helped her reach triple digits.

Staying busy and always learning

Fleischman stays busy in the care home by continuing to organize cultural events and talks for her fellow residents, featuring speakers from the Metropolitan Museum of Art, The New York Public Library, and Carnegie Hall, to name a few.

"I've been able to use my connections and friendships to invite people from organizations across the city to come and speak," she said, "and I think people have really enjoyed it."

Staying busy, or having lots of tasks to do and little spare time, was linked to better cognition in older adults in one 2016 study, as well as better memory and faster processing of information.

Fleischman also continues to learn at the assisted living center, including by watching video lectures about music from Juilliard.

Learning as we age could help maintain cognitive function and slow the decline of spatial skills and memory, according to a 2018 study.

Exercising

Growing up, Fleischman was not an "exercise freak," she said, but she's started working with a personal trainer to improve her balance and has "taken it in strides."

Being fit is an obvious way to improve longevity, and maintaining balance is an important part of that because it helps to prevent falls. The authors of a 2022 study found those aged over 50 were less likely to die within 10 years if they could stand on one foot for more than 10 seconds, and concluded that poor balance is a marker of shorter life expectancy.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, falls are the leading cause of injury-related death in people who are 65 or older.

BI's Gabby Landsverk recently reported on some of the best exercises for longevity and balance that don't require a gym.

Strong relationships

"I have loads of friendships," Fleischman said, many of whom she made through her work.

"It's a pleasure to work together for a common cause and find that you have a lot in common," she added.

She also had a "wonderful marriage" with her late husband.

Strong relationships are thought to be key to longevity. One 2019 study found that women who had an active social life were 41% more likely to reach age 85 than those who were isolated.

Research also shows that older people who volunteer are more likely to be physically and mentally healthier, happier, and satisfied.

Fleischman, who calls herself a "professional volunteer," has been doing so her whole life, and says that helping others "gives her pleasure."

• Supercommuters travel at least 75 miles or three hours to get to their jobs.
• Business Insider spoke with three supercommuters about the reasons they supercommute to work.
• One commuter said she has the best of both worlds when traveling from NYC to Michigan.

Over the last few years, many US workers have found themselves traveling farther to get to work but going into the office less often, thanks to hybrid work models.

They routinely wake up before sunrise to venture at least 75 miles to their workplace or spend at least three hours commuting to their job. Some of these supercommuters could move closer to their office, but they choose not to.

Business Insider spoke with three commuters who have traveled through multiple states to get to work each week. They shared the main reason they refused to move closer to their jobs.

Flying to Michigan weekly for work gave this New Yorker the best of both worlds

When BI spoke with Susan Miller in April, she had already been supercommuting for over two years.

The college professor shared how she lived in New York City but was flying to Ann Arbor, Michigan, weekly to teach at the University of Michigan Ross School of Business.

The 500-mile flight only takes two hours each way and costs her between $120 and $250 for a roundtrip ticket. The school doesn't cover her commute, but Miller uses her airline credit card to rack up miles and discounts.

"I enjoy the fresh air from the lakes and the nature of the Midwest, as opposed to city life," Miller told BI.

At the same time, the professor said she loves returning home to take advantage of everything that makes New York City exciting and interesting.

Living in the Delaware suburbs on an NYC salary made this four-state commute worth it

Kyle Rice started traveling from Wilmington, Delaware, to NYC every morning for work in February.

Even though Rice traveled 125 miles through four states to reach his project manager job at an EMS software company, it only took him two hours to get to work each day on the Amtrak and subway.

"I'd never consider relocating to NYC because it wouldn't be smart financially," Rice told BI.

His new six-figure job allowed him to double his salary, but he was spending $1,510 monthly on commuting. First, he'd drive eight minutes to Amtrak and catch the 6:30 a.m. train from Wilmington to Newark, New Jersey. That ride took an hour and 37 minutes.

Then Rice would hop on the PATH in Newark and ride that railway for 30 minutes into NYC. Despite the traveling expense and time, Rice said his home in Delaware is way more affordable than living in New York City.

When BI interviewed Rice in May, his job had shifted his in-office schedule from daily to twice a week.

Traveling from LA to New York four times a month made this flight attendant happier

In 2023, flight attendant Malick Mercier moved to Los Angeles to live in a place with more creatives. But he was still a New York crew member.

"I knew that there'd be more creative people in Los Angeles, and I was finding myself really happy here on layovers," Mercier told BI.

Four times a month, he'd spend between five and eight hours commuting from LA to New York, and he said it wasn't easy. The airline worker would sometimes have to take three buses just to get to the Los Angeles International Airport before starting his 2,400-mile flight to work. And he'd book his ticket the night before or the day of his commute.

Mercier said occasionally getting to work on time was risky, but he always made it. His love and passion for his job made it all worth it.

"Plenty of people are like, 'Is it worth it?' And I feel like, yes, because this is my dream."

If you're a supercommuter or tried supercommuting and want to share your story, email Manseen Logan at mlogan@businessinsider.com.

• My daughter doesn't fold her laundry or do dishes right after eating, and I judged her for it.
• I do these things for her and her family when I visit, and I worry that it annoys them. 
• I realized that she doesn't fuss over cleaning because it gives her more time with her kids.

I think my kids should do their dishes immediately after eating, fold their laundry, and make their beds — because that's what I do. But I've never seen my daughter and son-in-law's bed made. I don't make it for them, but I do often empty their overflowing bathroom wastebasket when I visit them.

When my daughter Ali brought my future son-in-law Chrix home to meet me for the first time, he learned just how helpful I am. His suitcase was on the floor full of unfolded clothes. I assumed they were dirty, scooped them up, washed them, folded them, and put them in a drawer.

I love visiting my daughter's family

They married five years ago and have two daughters, now 3-years-old and 18 months. Most evenings, they video call me during dinner, and I feel like I'm at the table with them. The kids are great at including me in their lives. A few weeks ago, when I was staying with them, my daughter said, "Mommy, stop folding the clothes."

I ignored her and continued folding like I always did. Then, more firmly but without anger, she said, "I'm not letting you fold the clothes," and took them from the dining room table into the bedroom. She is as patient with me as she is with her daughters.

She told other family members who were visiting how freeing it is not to fold clothes. "I sort them in piles, then they go into the appropriate drawers," she said.

My daughter does things differently from how she was raised

It's hard to believe that my daughter, who grew up in a house with her shirts perfectly aligned in color-coded piles, doesn't fold the laundry.

Ali comes from a long line of benevolent meddlers. My grandmother stuck a middle initial on my birth certificate while my mother was still dopey after my birth. My husband and I were a little annoyed when my mother threw away the pillows in our first apartment and bought us what she thought were better ones. At first, we complained, until we realized that they were better.

When I visit my kids, I vacuum the sesame seeds out of the freezer that are there because they leave bagels in an open paper bag and don't bother to use a Ziplock. And it's not because they're saving the earth. Every light in the apartment is on at all times. When I was a little girl, if I left the bathroom light on, my mother would say, "Do you own stock in Florida Power and Light?"

I don't think they notice when I clean their freezer, but often Ali tells me that she worries that I'm working too much.

My son told me that Chrix asked him why I have to rearrange things all the time. I wondered if he was referring to the time I put all their spices in order or arranged all the bowls in the cabinet. He might find me annoying, but I'm hoping he thinks having me around the kids outweighs his annoyance.

When Ali caught me picking up toys, she said, "Mommy, don't worry about the toys, they'll just be on the floor again after school."

"Am I driving you crazy?" I asked.

"No, we appreciate the help, but we'd rather you hang out with the girls than clean up," she said.

It felt like she was rejecting the way she was raised, rejecting me. I asked her if she ever felt unloved as a child when I did household chores. She said, "Never."

Then she laughed at the video I took of Noa vacuuming. "Look how thorough she is. She even vacuumed the dining chairs," I said.

"She's her Nanu's granddaughter," Ali replied.

Later, Ali called me the "baby whisperer" because I was the only one who could calm my younger granddaughter, and I felt loved, not rejected.

On the last day of my visit, Ali and Chrix thanked me for getting up at 6 a.m. with the girls each day so they could sleep in, which may be why they didn't hide the dust buster from me.

They are moving to Seattle at the end of the month for work, as far away from me in Miami as possible in the mainland United States. I know it's not to get away from me because each house they looked at had a room for me, and they asked me which one I preferred. I tried not to weigh in, but my son says I make faces and noises when I don't like something. They bought my favorite of the houses and asked me to come for the entire summer.

Now, I realize that they're trying to manage their time efficiently and be good parents. Ali lets my granddaughters play in the tub for 45 minutes instead of rushing them into their pajamas. Then she reads them a bonus book after she already read the three books that Noa insists on because she's 3.

I can see that Ali is tired and just wants some time to herself, but she places importance on what matters: the girls, not the dirty dishes. I clean up and do the dishes because I don't want her to have to do one more thing at the end of the day. It's meddling, but it's also helping and I won't stop, and as I fold the fourth load of laundry that day, I realize that my daughter is doing a great job, even though it's different than the way I did things.

• My CFO and I became good friends while working, but there was nothing romantic between us.
• When I quit the job, he showed up at my house to deliver me my last pay stub, and we kissed.
• On our first date, we realized we are meant for each other and have been together for 25 years.

I have read and heard about "love at first sight" many times, but my true love story is somewhere on the other end of the spectrum.

When I worked as an insurance agent for a brokerage, David was the CFO. We saw one another most days and occasionally were the only ones working in the building when the official workday had ended, but reams of paperwork still covered our desks.

After a phone call from a client got on my last nerve, it wasn't unusual for me to grab a cold soft drink and hide in his office for half an hour.

There was no romantic spark between us. We were just two coworkers who relied on each other's company to get through the workday.

But all that changed when I decided to change jobs.

A knock at the door changed everything

I liked my job, but I knew a good deal when I saw it. Another company offered me a position with a higher base salary and commission.

After giving my notice, I took the summer off, excited to dive deeper into the insurance industry.

On the following Friday, around noon, my doorbell rang. David looked a little sheepish when I answered the door. He said, "I thought I would drop off your pay stub."

On payday, David would always deliver everyone's pay stub to their desk. David felt he still needed to deliver my pay stub one last time.

I invited him in for lunch which turned out to be a couple of subs, quickly thrown together.

After an hour of jovial conversation, David reluctantly said he needed to return to the office.

What happened may be reminiscent of a daytime soap or drama, but it's all true. As he reached the door, David turned around, and his car keys slipped out of his hand. We both bent over to pick them up, our eyes meeting and locking together as we stood upright again.

A few uncomfortable seconds passed before David leaned in for a kiss that lasted several minutes. When the hottest kiss I ever had was over, he fumbled over the words, "I should…"

At the same time, I said, "You'll call?" David told me he would call, and as he headed back to his car, I leaned against the door.

"Whoa," I thought. "Where the heck did that come from?"

We went on a date, and we've been together ever since

I expected David to call maybe the next week, giving me time to absorb what had happened and what it meant. It turned out that I didn't have that much time.

David's number came up on my phone later that evening, and I answered tentatively. "I just wanted to make sure you weren't mad at me for, you know, what happened today," he said.

I surely wasn't mad — maybe a little confused, but definitely not mad.

We talked for over two hours and made dinner plans the next week. I had no qualms about David picking me up.

Having spent five days deciding what to wear as I stood in front of my closet, the clothes yet again staring back at me, I opted to buy a new dress. At the mall, I found a dress and a matching purse — all in under an hour. But it turned out the shoes caused the most indecisiveness. I wanted to wear flats to avoid getting my heel stuck in the cobblestone sidewalk, but David was nearly seven feet tall. I picked out a pair of stilettos and would take my chances.

In hindsight, I shouldn't have worried about my outfit because that evening brought us a revelation: We were meant to be together. We had both been in a prior long-term relationship that didn't work out; we each had a child, and we genuinely liked one another.

Just over a month later, we were engaged.

It took us four years of being coworkers before we discovered we were the perfect match. But I'm happy we waited because everything worked out. We've now spent half a century together happily.

• AI hype has been everywhere since OpenAI introduced ChatGPT to the world.
• Gary Marcus doesn't think we should buy the hype.
• The academic has emerged as a vocal critic of OpenAI — and thinks it could end up like WeWork. 

Gary Marcus doesn't consider himself an AI skeptic. Don't let that throw you, though, when he argues that OpenAI could turn out to be as much of a dumpster fire as WeWork.

"I actually want AI to succeed, so to call me an AI skeptic as many people do is to miss that I'm not skeptical," Marcus told Business Insider. "I'm skeptical of how we're doing it right now."

For the 54-year-old cognitive scientist and AI researcher based in Vancouver, set to publish a book titled "Taming Silicon Valley" this fall, the AI of "right now" has made it hard for him not to be restless.

Since the launch of ChatGPT, Marcus has watched as AI fever has swept across the world. That fervor has set OpenAI on a dangerous path that he thinks strays from its original nonprofit mission to build AI that benefits humanity.

The euphoria and hype surrounding it have also left it dangerously unchecked in a way that parallels Adam Neumann's scandal-ridden startup, which has since fallen from grace.

"OpenAI might be the WeWork of AI," Marcus said. "I ran a poll [on X]. More people thought that was plausible than not."

At the same time, Marcus has seen large language models (LLMs) — the technology underpinning generative AI tools like ChatGPT — attract billions of dollars amid shaky promises from industry leaders like OpenAI CEO Sam Altman that they might one day guide humanity to the field's holy grail of artificial general intelligence (AGI).

Buying all the hype, he estimates, is a huge mistake: "The AI we're using right now has many fundamental problems."

OpenAI did not respond to a request for comment from BI.

OpenAI's top skeptic

Marcus hasn't always felt this distressed about the industry.

Just over a year ago, in May 2023, he sat side-by-side with Altman to address questions from lawmakers on Capitol Hill about the dangers posed by AI. By his own measure, both he and the OpenAI chief agreed that AI was a deeply complex technology that would cause serious societal problems if left unchecked. Its problems, ranging from bias and hallucinations to its potential to warp election outcomes with false information, demanded attention.

"I do think he was sincere in his concerns," Marcus said, noting that Altman shared the same birthday as J. Robert Oppenheimer, the theoretical physicist behind the atomic bomb. "He does not want to cause the destruction of the world."

A year on, however, the mood has clearly shifted.

While Marcus left Washington last year feeling "mostly impressed" with the ChatGPT boss, a series of developments in and around OpenAI since then have put him on high alert.

The most dramatic moment after the Capitol Hill hearing came in November when Altman was fired as OpenAI's CEO. The company's board had concluded that "he was not consistently candid in his communications."

One major allegation against Altman was that he tried to persuade board members to push out Helen Toner, a fellow director, after she published a research paper criticizing OpenAI's efforts to make AI safe. According to Toner, he also "started lying to other board members" to turn them against her.

As Marcus recalled, "the world was treating him as a saint" until then. Leaders including France's Emmanuel Macron, India's Narendra Modi, and South Korea's Yoon Suk Yeol offered Altman a statesman-like welcome during a global tour last year.

Though the firing saga stunned Silicon Valley, triggering a mission among key OpenAI backers like Microsoft to reinstall the ousted CEO, Marcus saw signs of inconsistency hiding in plain sight.

One example: when Sen. John Kennedy asked Altman if he "makes a lot of money" during last year's hearing, the OpenAI CEO quickly responded that he has "no equity in OpenAI." That was not the clearest answer he could have given.

Altman maintained ownership of the OpenAI Startup Fund until March 29, ownership that Toner said the board wasn't originally informed of. Altman also serves as chairman of nuclear fusion startup Helion Energy, and has carved an "opaque investment empire" worth at least $2.8 billion as of earlier this year, The Wall Street Journal reported this month.

With this in mind, Marcus has been hardly surprised as OpenAI has had drama around inconsistency unfold again.

GPT-4o, OpenAI's new model unveiled in May, was criticized by Scarlett Johansson for carrying — without permission — a voice called Sky that resembled the AI assistant she voiced in the movie "Her." Though Altman later claimed that Sky "was never intended to resemble" Johansson's voice, he couldn't help but tweet "her" after the GPT-4o launch event.

"He's still saying, well, the resemblance is coincidental," Marcus said. "People are like, 'What am I, stupid?' The reaction right now, I think rightly so, is that he takes us to be fools."

OpenAI's safety commitments have been questioned after top safety researchers, including Ilya Sutskever and Jan Leike, left last month. Its treatment of employees is also under scrutiny after details emerged about strict clauses that threatened to claw back workers' vested equity if they didn't sign non-disparagement agreements.

The generative AI problem

More broadly, Marcus is concerned that a focus on LLM-led generative AI is leading the industry down the wrong path.

While he acknowledges that the technology powering ChatGPT has its uses, he doesn't think it'll get humanity toward a form of AI that can rival human intelligence. He points to the "diminishing returns" each successive new AI model has displayed, with performance improvements seemingly becoming smaller each time a new model is introduced.

"Billions of dollars have been spent on them, and that has starved everything else out," Marcus said. "LLMs are not useless. They can do some things. But they're not actually AGI. They're not trustworthy, they're not reliable."

Not everyone agrees with him. In recent months, Marcus has drawn sharp criticism from "AI godfathers" including Yann LeCun and Geoffrey Hinton over his views on today's most-hyped technology.

Marcus feels he has been pointing out that LLMs are not the path forward to AGI for some time, an idea he thinks the likes of LeCun — Meta's chief AI scientist — have not acknowledged until recently.

LeCun has previously suggested "LLMs are an offramp on the path to AGI," but he has also shared the view that "by amplifying human intelligence, AI may cause a new Renaissance, perhaps a new phase of the Enlightenment." In an interview with the Financial Times last month, he acknowledged pretty bluntly that LLMs have a "very limited understanding of logic," making them unlikely candidates for AGI.

Marcus takes that as a small sign of hope that people are slowly waking up to the limitations of today's AI: "What gives me a little bit of optimism is that people are finally facing reality."

His hope now is that Altman can do the same and face the reality of the mess that has passed. His message to the OpenAI chief is that it's not too late to change course: "Return to the mission. Really make OpenAI a force for good."

• Kate Middleton attended the 2024 Trooping the Colour parade in London on Saturday.
• It's the first time she's been officially seen in public since revealing her cancer diagnosis.
• The event honors King Charles III's birthday and includes a military parade.

Kate Middleton returned to the public eye on Saturday when she attended the 2024 Trooping the Colour parade in London.

The event, which takes place at the Horse Guards Parade near Buckingham Palace and marks King Charles III's official birthday, was the Princess of Wales' first official appearance this year.

Her last appearance was on December 25, 2023, when she attended the traditional Christmas Day walk to a Church service in Sandringham, Norfolk.

Buckingham Palace previously confirmed to the BBC that King Charles would also attend his official birthday celebration amid his treatment for cancer, though he will ride in a carriage instead of on horseback.

Kate was first photographed being driven to Buckingham Palace with the rest of her family. 

The princess was driven to Buckingham Palace 30 minutes before the parade began, alongside her husband, Prince William, and children, Prince George, 10, Princess Charlotte, 8, and Prince Louis, 5.

The princess looked in good spirits ahead of the parade.

Kate's appearance at the annual royal event comes nearly four months after she announced that she has cancer and had been undergoing preventative chemotherapy.

She shared the news in a video released to the public on March 22. Calls from the public for Kensington Palace to address the princess's health came to a head following the discovery that a photo of the Wales family, released on Mother's Day in the UK, had been digitally altered.

In a press release shared with Business Insider after her cancer diagnosis was made public, Kensington Palace said that she would be returning to work "when she is cleared to do so by her medical team."

The princess opted for a monochrome look for the event.

The mother-of-three wore a white dress adorned with a large black-and-white bow and a brooch for the event. She paired the monochrome outfit with a white wide-brim hat and pearl cluster earrings

Kate announced that she would be attending the event the day before

She announced on Instagram and X that she was making "good progress" with her chemotherapy treatment and was looking forward to attending The King's Birthday Parade.

The post, accompanied by a new photograph of Kate taken at her home in Windsor earlier this week, read: "I have been blown away by all the kind messages of support and encouragement over the last couple of months. It really has made the world of difference to William and me and has helped us both through some of the harder times."

She added that she has been experiencing "good days and bad days."

She wrote that,"On those bad days you feel weak, tired and you have to give in to your body resting. But on the good days, when you feel stronger, you want to make the most of feeling well."

Kate added that her treatment is ongoing but that she is starting to do "a little work from home" and that she hopes to attend more public engagements over the summer.

"I am learning how to be patient, especially with uncertainty," she added. "Taking each day as it comes, listening to my body, and allowing myself to take this much needed time to heal."